The Quiet Shift

The end of January has a very specific flavour.

The hype is gone. The “New Year, new me” energy has fizzled out. The dopamine of fresh planners, fresh goals, fresh promises has been replaced by the ordinary reality of life - deadlines, family needs, body stuff, emotional labour, clients, inboxes, and the constant background hum of a loud world.

And if you’re a menopausal (or perimenopausal) entrepreneur, this time of year can feel like a double shift.

On one hand, it’s the natural comedown after the pressure of “starting over”.
On the other, it’s a bigger life transition that doesn’t ask politely. It just… arrives. And it changes what you can tolerate.

If you’ve had a sudden “fuck it” moment lately - you’re not alone. I’ve seen it in myself and in so many women. Not the chaotic, burn-it-all-down kind (although, fair). More the crystal-clear kind.

The kind where you’re simply done abandoning yourself.

The January comedown is not failure - it’s honesty

January sells us a story: reinvention is quick, clean, and aesthetic.

But real change is rarely like that. Real change is quieter. It shows up when the confetti has been swept away and you’re left with the truth:

• What actually matters to you now?

• What feels heavy?

• What feels like noise?

• What are you doing out of habit, obligation, or old identity?

If you’ve noticed that “nothing has changed”, it might not mean you lack discipline. It might mean the version of you who made those goals… isn’t the version of you who needs to live them.

Sometimes, end-of-January is the first moment we can hear ourselves again.

And what we hear is often simple: I want peace.

Menopause has a way of making the truth unavoidable

The pause can feel like a magnifying glass over your whole life.

Things you could once tolerate become intolerable.
Things you used to smooth over suddenly feel impossible to fake.
Your body becomes a truth-teller - not always gently, but faithfully.

Many women describe a moment where it’s like scales fall from their eyes. You start seeing the patterns you’ve been participating in for years:

• over-giving that turned into resentment

• co-dependency disguised as “being needed”

• people-pleasing dressed up as “being kind”

• staying small to keep others comfortable

• carrying the emotional labour of everyone else’s life

And when that clarity hits, it can be devastating.

Because it’s not just insight. It’s grief.

Grief for the woman you were before you knew better.
Grief for the years you spent prioritising everyone else.
Grief for the parts of you that got buried under expectations.

If you’re in that grief, you don’t need to push through it. You need space. You need safety. You need permission to be tender.

This is also where that “snake energy” metaphor can feel real: you’re shedding an old skin. And shedding can sting - even when it’s necessary.

Plug the leaks: honouring your future self starts here

Here’s what I’ve observed again and again: around 50 (give or take), women stop negotiating with their own needs.

You’ve earned your standards.
You’ve earned your boundaries.
You’ve earned a life that doesn’t require you to betray yourself to keep it running.

This is where “selfish” becomes sacred.

Not selfish as in “I don’t care about anyone.”
Selfish as in: I care about me too.

Honouring your future self might look like:

• reducing emotional labour (even if it disappoints people)

• saying no without a paragraph of justification

• simplifying your business so it supports your nervous system

• choosing relationships that feel reciprocal

• stopping the slow drain of tolerating what you’ve outgrown

And if you’re thinking, I don’t even know what I want anymore - that’s common. When you’ve been oriented around everyone else for years, your own desire can feel quiet at first.

That doesn’t mean it’s gone. It means it’s been outshouted.

You don’t need to “have it all together” before you start. Often the mess is exactly where we find the gold.

If you want support, I’m offering a free capacity call where we’ll look at:

• where your energy is leaking

• what you’re tolerating that’s costing you

• where you’re not honouring your future self

• what would create more peace (in business and life)

No pressure, no fixing — just truth, clarity, and a gentle plan forward. Get in touch through all the ways.

You’re not behind. You’re becoming.

Much love

Sharonah x